Overcome Your Insecurity in Relationships

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When two people become a couple, there is always a chance that one of them will be more reactive to the behavior of the other, especially if he lacks the needed self-esteem.
For the sake of this article, let's assume the insecure person is a male.
However, if you are a woman, you can still learn and implement this because many of the principles discussed here apply to both sexes.
In a relationship, it is usually acceptable for the woman to show her insecure side (seriously, what woman hasn't done that?), but the same can't be said about the man.
Male insecurities in relationships are considered extremely unattractive and oftentimes the main reason why women leave men.
Sure, women love it when a guy shows his vulnerable side (from time-to-time), but being insecure isn't really a good long term strategy and definitely not a turn-on for her.
Insecurities in a relationship usually stem from deep seated personal issues.
It's not like guys suddenly turn insecure when they get into relationships.
Men who are insecure in every relationship are insecure people overall.
Usually they hope for the girl to fix them in a "she makes me want to be a better person!" way, but this rarely happens.
To really overcome your insecurities, you have to improve your overall situation.
The first step is to learn why you turn into this insecure mess when you start dating a beautiful girl.
Is it because you always doubt yourself? Or because you can't imagine what she is doing with you in the first place? Or is it because you are constantly thinking that she might cheat on you? So, let's dig a little bit deeper and find out how to overcome insecurity in relationships.
It shouldn't really come as a surprise to anyone that the biggest problem of an insecure man is his flawed mindset.
It's his flawed mindset that turns him into a guy who lacks the needed self-esteem.
It's his flawed mindset that makes him start revealing his insecurities to the girl.
It's his flawed mindset that in the long run jeopardizes the relationship.
The thing is: a guy with this kind of mindset is extremely needy and desperate for a woman's affection.
He can't bear the thought of losing her.
Losing her is like losing his identity.
To him, his partner is the sole solution to his inner seated problems.
And that's why he becomes dependent on her and feels incomplete without her.
This is also when his insecurities usually start to surface and where the girl starts to notice that the charming, great guy she fell for can't even keep his own stuff together - how is he able to support her when she really needs it? Like you can imagine, this kind of mindset will actually push her further away from him.
So, how do you fix it? How do you overcome your insecurity issues in relationships? Simple! You have to adopt a new mindset! The thing you have to understand is that a woman wants a man who doesn't need her (I didn't say "want").
What he demonstrates with this attitude is that his happiness doesn't depend on women and he has other things to make him feel better about himself.
A male who doesn't need women to become happy, is an attractive male.
This is by far the most important advice an insecure man in a relationship could follow.
By not putting his girlfriend on the pedestal and finding other things that bring him happiness, he will probably fix most of his insecurity issues.
If you are really serious about overcoming insecurity in relationships you have to find your own source of happiness and not hoping for your significant other to do it for you.
This also means you have to get rid of negative behaviors that harm the relationship.
Stop trying to win her approval! Stop your possessiveness and selfishness! Stop demanding all of her time and attention! Never rely only on your woman to change yourself - she won't make you a different person - you are the only one who can really make a difference.
She can only point you in the right direction, and it's up to you to let her.
I wish I could tell you that overcoming your insecurities is something you could learn fast and effortlessly but this is not the truth.
Actually it is a process that requires you to totally change your mindset about many things and therefore it takes time.
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