It's teaming with cars, lane-splitting choppers, frantic cops, stressed-out valets, and every kind of tourist, wannabe, could-have-been, celebrity, and has-been imaginable.
It's the single most driven stretch of real estate in the city.
Imagine the Vegas Strip - now take away four lanes of road and funnel twice as many people into a half-mile that is no more substantial than the broken dreams it was built on.
This is Los Angeles.
This is what was, what is, and what will never be.
I bounced down to LA from Frisco, looking to find a little piece of that Hollywood dream.
You know, the kind of dream that pays all your bills and makes everything all better.
The happy ending - the one that never seems to come.
Or it comes too soon for some.
I a friend in the city, a real fixer of a "chap.
" He was from old money - Boston money - and he invited me to come out for a right old Los Angeles dinner cruise.
Not being one to shy away from boats, I accepted.
As far as a dinner cruise went, I have to say it was pretty swank.
Waiters in white jackets - the rented kind that get laundered by a uniform service - but still, it's the thought that counts.
All around were movie producer types -- and the fawning types who keep them in business.
I was out of place.
I found the boat itself was the most entertaining thing about the cruise.
I bellied up to the rail of the deck and looked out at the quiet Pacific yawning before me like the mouth of some ancient Leviathan and I was happy.
Besides, the crab cakes were pretty tasty.
All in all, if I had to make a recommendation - I would.
If you get a chance to stow-away on a cruise in LA, don't think - just do it.