I do not believe in abusing children.
I do not equate spanking with abuse.
Spanking a child under the wrong conditions and too often can turn into a pattern of abuse.
But spanking a child as a very last resort under the following conditions can prove to be beneficial and not harmful.
Spanking should only be done for serious misbehavior or for a continuous pattern of disobedience.
Spanking should only be done after the parent has calmed down.
It should never be done when a parent is angry! Never! When we are angry, we begin to lose rational thought and allow our emotions to control our behavior, both verbal and physical.
When this happens, we begin to lose control.
If a parent is going to spank a child, then he or she must be in control! 3.
Spanking should only be on the bottom/buttocks.
No where else.
One to two swats is all that is necessary.
A child needs to understand why he is being spanked.
This is a huge teachable moment and parents must do all they can to make certain that their child understands the reason for the spanking.
If you are spanking because of serious misbehavior, then your child needs a firm understanding that this misbehavior will not be tolerated.
If you are spanking because of continued disobedience, then your child needs to understand that you require his obedience.
It is not optional.
You never know if or when you could find yourself in a dangerous situation with your child and his/her obedience is absolutely critical to his/her safety.
If a parent practices effective discipline with their child, then spanking should not have to be implemented much more than a couple of times in early childhood.
In these cases, all attempts at discipline have not caused the misbehavior or disobedience to disappear.
Spanking becomes the final attempt to bring the behavior under control.
Spanking is most effective when used in this manner and does not have to be used very often as a result.
Spanking has gotten a bad rap because it is too often abused by parents.
Spanking should never take the place of normal, effective discipline techniques.
But there are some parents out there that resort to spanking right away and then use it so often that it becomes ineffective.
In these instances, parents may feel that they need to spank their child more often to keep their behavior under control.
If this happens, then the spankings that the child receives lose their effectiveness and do very little good.
The parent then has no other means to control the misbehavior.
They begin to spank out of frustration and anger and this is the worst time to spank a child.
This pattern can easily lead to abuse.
If we could only teach parents effective techniques to discipline their children, then there would be very little need for spanking.
This is not to say that spanking would never be necessary.
What I am saying is that effective discipline techniques need to be taught and used correctly.
It is when they are not taught and not used correctly that parents get frustrated and resort to spanking as a means of constant behavioral control.
This may be why so many people have come out against spanking.
When done correctly and seldom, spanking is really less harmful to a child than a shot from the doctor.
We all know that a shot hurts momentarily.
But we allow this in order to protect our children from contracting some nasty diseases.
Spanking hurts momentarily and hopefully protects our children from getting into serious trouble later in life