Teenage guys who are trying to figure out their sexual orientation often wonder if they are gay or bisexual.
As 16-year-old AlainD95 writes,
"I'm pretty sure that I am either bi or gay. But I don't know if I'm just in a teenage phase. I'm almost positive because I fantasize about men all the time but I want to know if this is just a phase. I really want to know so I can start letting people know and start living my life. What I don't want to do is something only to later find out it was just raging hormones."
Another 16-year old, ace_uchiha writes:
"Am I gay or bi? I like the idea of going out with girls, but not the idea of having sex with them. Although I am scared to go out with a guy, I think about having sex with them all the time. I also like the idea of kissing both males and females, but I sometimes think about kissing guys more. I get greatly turned on when I see two guys kissing on the internet and when two guys have sexual interactions with each other, but never really two girls."
Nate42, is in a similar situation. He explains:
"I don't know whether I'm gay or bisexual. Ever since I was little I knew I liked guys, so I thought I was gay until in 6th grade I started to like this girl. I didn't like her much for her looks, more for her personality. That's when I guessed I was bi. I guess it doesn't really matter to me if it's a girl or boy as long as I like their personality but I more often think about guys then girls."
There are a lot of reasons teens wonder if they are gay or bisexual.
For some it is simply the process of questioning their sexual orientation. For others, it is a way to accept being gay, since they might feel more comfortable with the bisexual label. It is perfectly normal for teens to question their sexual orientation. It is also normal for teens to have sexual feelings for same and opposite gender partners. These feelings may be an indication of someone's sexual orientation, or they may not. Only time will tell.
But if the question of whether you are gay or bisexual is troubling you, you can ask yourself some question to help you try to figure out the answer.
If you think you might be gay or lesbian, here are some things to ask yourself:
- Who do you usually have crushes on? Is it mainly someone of the same gender?
- Do you imagine relationships with someone of the same gender?
- If you dated or had a sexual experience with someone of the opposite gender, how did it make you feel?
- If you dated or had a sexual experience with someone of the same gender, how did it make you feel?
If you think you might be bisexual, you can ask yourself these questions:
- Do you feel strongly attracted to people of both genders?
- Do you think you could have a sexual or romantic relationship with either males or females?
Asking yourself these types of questions can be helpful, but don't worry if you don't know the answers right now. Though we really like to label people as either gay or bisexual, it is also fine not to feel as if one of these labels fits perfectly!